Thursday, November 19, 2009

My Breastfeeding Dilemma.

I am completely torn when it comes to my breastfeeding situation. I feel like I'm not producing enough, I mean I have enough most days.. but its a constant stresser. But then If I supplement and give Michaela formula, it breaks my heart. She doesnt have the breast-milk breathe and she makes a face like it tastes horrid, which I dont doubt. I want to give her formula but I hate that she doesnt like it. Honestly what I really want is to have an amazing supply and not worry about it anymore but thats not the case. I see the easy way out in sight which would be to give her formula, easy on hand.. and I could get WIC so it wouldn't be that much, but on the other hand, I love breatfeeding her, I feel like its what my body is made to do. But it stressful. I am so jealous of women that have amazing supplies and its never an issue, and Im jealous of people that just give their children formula and don't have a rediculous complex about it. I wish it wasn't so important to me, but bottom line it is. I know that because I feel its the best for her I will probably breastfeed until 6 months or until the flu season is over. Once she starts on baby food, which I'm planning on making myself, I think it will be easier for me to start using formula, hopefully! hahaha! I'm so bullheaded sometimes. Hopefully Michaela appreciates me for this, though I doubt that too!

1 comment:

  1. i completely understand where you're coming from. it broke my heart i was unable to breast feed landon. I cried everytime i had to give him formula, and everything he'd spit the breast milk out. your doing a great job. and just be thankful you've gotten the chance to have that amazing bond with her, and that you were able to. :D

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